Important Stuff -- Or Not: Rambling

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Rambling

Fox News reports that a tofu-lover in Colorado didn't get the personalized license plate she wanted. It seems the state thought the plate could be offensive to some. I can't imagine why. ILVTOFU By the way, combine some firm, chopped tofu, mayo, chopped onions and a squirt of mustard and you'll have a pretty darn good imitation egg salad. I took the night off Monday and spent it cleaning my apartment. I've been letting things slide since I broke my ankle in November. It took me 11 hours, but it's tidy now. Sarah and Willow are in awe, because they've never seen the place clean before. They can walk along and just flop down anywhere without fear of impaling themselves on something. And their chases have become much more entertaining since they've been able to increase their speed. Somehow, a clutter-free space seems bigger. I got a self-winding wrist watch recently. The problem is, I don't move enough to keep it wound (well, I don't wear it at work or at home). So, I had to get a watch winder to keep it going. I didn't even know there was such a thing. I'm guessing I have once again thwarted those people who say I'm impossible to shop for. O'Reilly time.

8 comments:

Tonto said...: UHH I can see why?

We get it everywhere else I don't want to start reading expletives on license plates too.

But how funny that the exact same initials can stand for separate sentences!

Its like that stupid line Brittany sings in her song Megyn Kelly was criticizing...If you seek me...5 times fast...

Who knew?; 3:29 AM
Mark said...: I got my wife that free pearl necklace from Stauer you linked to the other week.

"It is very nice", my wife said, just before she placed it back in the velvet bag it came in and put it away in the drawer.

(sigh) You aren't the only one hard to shop for.; 8:16 AM
Mark said...: I have sprain (sprained?) both of my ankles several times in my lifetime, but last year I sustained a particularly bad and painful one in my left ankle. It took a couple of weeks to heal, unlike the couple of days previous sprains took, and the swelling didn't go completely down for several weeks.

But it healed. I think. Lately, it has been giving me a lot of pain for no apparent reason. I don't know what's going on.

I guess I'm getting old.

I don't like tofu, onions, mayo, or mustard, so you'll pardon me if I don't try your recipe for imitation egg salad.

I liked mustard when i was a child but I made the mistake of making myself a mustard sandwich. I could never eat mustard again.; 8:33 AM
Tonto said...: Actually now that I am thinking of it...forget the TOFU lover that would be a better license plate for a lawyer... :); 11:17 AM
Lone Ranger said...: Soooo, WAS it really nice? I've never laid eyes on one. Maybe the person I got it for was just being polite.

I hated butter as a kid. I remember when I was about nine, stepping out the door on my way to Sunday school and getting hit in the face with the odor of butter that was just overwhelming. I don't know what it was or where it came from. It was like being doused with a bucket of water. I got instantly sick and told my dad I didn't want to go to church. He wasn't having any of it. I got my revenge by throwing up all over the classroom and being in bed for three days. I wasn't able to eat butter again until I joined the military. I found out that bread and butter was one of the few things the mess hall couldn't screw up.; 2:55 PM
Tonto said...: I wish I could find a food that would make me never want it again.; 6:22 PM
Lone Ranger said...: Try uni. It is the edible part of the sea urchin. Worst thing I've ever tasted in my life. It was like licking the bilge water in the hold of a Chinese junk. Not that I've ever tasted the bilge water in the hull of a Chinese junk, but I've smelled it.; 10:13 PM
Mark said...: Sorry about taking so long to answer, LR.

Like you, I don't know if my wife was just being polite, but she did say, "It's too short, and won't fit my neck without an extender".

I said, "I'll make it fit"

She said, "You'll choke me to death trying."

I said, "Is that supposed to be a down side?"; 3:46 PM

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Talking Points

I don't use talking points, I create them.

1. Hate makes people stoopid.

2. There is nothing so impenetrable as a closed mind.

3. A stupid person is not someone who can't learn, but someone who refuses to learn.

4. It is a small mind that has no room for God.

5. You can take Stalin out of the gene pool, but you can't take Stalinism out of liberals.

6. The best way to sabotage a bad plan is to follow it to the letter.

7. The race card is the first refuge of people who have nothing to say.

8. Ignorance is the cornerstone of arrogance.

9. Which is more racist, to hate someone who is not white or to assume someone is racist because he is white?

10. Children are not stupid. If a child is taught, the child will learn. If a child is not learning, the child is not being taught.

11. To express righteous indignation, one must first be righteous. And that's a label that doesn't stick to liberals.

12. Profanity is ignorance made audible.

13. An open mind is a liberal's worst enemy.

14. Paternalism is the purest form of racism.

15. People who bend the truth, usually bend it in their favor.

16. If you always stand in opposition to liberalism, you will never be wrong.

18. Life is simple. People who make it complicated usually have an agenda.

19. Getting your news from the corrupt, liberal media is like sticking your head in the sand, except you don't get grit in your teeth.

20. Liberals' emotional development stops at the age of 16.

21. To anger a conservative, lie to him. To anger a liberal, tell the truth.

22. Idealism seldom matches up with reality.

23. Those who don't hate communism have never lived it.

24. This was a much more civil country when men walked about heavily armed.

25. This economy will never heal as long as Obama keeps picking at the scab.

26. Liberals don't think outside the box; they ARE the box.

27. You cannot change the hearts and minds of liberals, because they possess neither.

28. There is no such thing as a kind liberal.

29. Reading Democratic Party platforms is like reading the history of human rights abuses and crimes against humanity in this country.

25 Immutable Truths About Liberals

Over the years I've been writing this blog, I've been throwing out little self-evident truths that seem to have no exceptions that prove the rule. I've made a list of some of them and will add to it as I remember them or make up more. Most of this list I've come up with myself. A few I've borrowed from others.

1. Always expect the worst from a liberal and you will never be surprised.

2. Never try to reason with a liberal. They disregard any evidence that conflicts with their beliefs.

3. You can always tell what liberals are up to by what they accuse conservatives of doing.

4. Liberals don't debate, they argue.

5. The only standards liberals have are double standards.

6. Liberals feel, conservatives think.

7. Whenever you don't understand a liberal's motives, just look for the money.

8. Liberals cannot be embarrassed. They lack the gene to blush.

9. The Liberal Golden Rule is, "Do unto others but scream bloody murder if they do unto you."

10. Liberals don't have leaders, they have demi-gods.

11. There are no honest liberals. If they were honest -- especially to themselves -- they would be conservatives.

12. A liberal's business is nobody's business, but everyone's business is a liberal's business.

13. Liberals have an inflated sense of self-worth. They are like house flies that criticize the air-worthiness of a Stealth fighter. (Sarah Palin, George W. Bush, ad infinitum are morons.)

14. Liberals lack a sixth sense that conservatives have in abundance -- common sense.

15. Liberals never stop hating.

16. There are only two types of liberals -- the deceivers and the deceived. The difficulty is telling them apart.

17. Every time liberals get on their high horse, they get bucked off.

18. Liberal programs are so wonderful that they have to be forced on people.

19. Liberals always choke on their own medicine.

20. When given a moral choice, liberals always come down on the wrong side of the fence.

21. The only way liberals can build themselves up is by tearing others down.

22. Liberals not only refuse to learn from their mistakes, they refuse to admit them.

23. Liberals have only two political positions -- blind devotion and blind hatred.

24. Liberals are incapable of attacking the message, so they always attack the messenger.

25. Liberal diversity is only skin deep.