Tuesday, December 23, 2008

BULLETIN: SANTA DRIVE ENDS IN DISASTER! RED ON THE HIGHWAY!

OK, so I was out cold on over-the-counter pain meds until about 9 am.  When I woke up, I looked outside and the sun was shining and it was 29 degrees.  Yikes.  Well, I was determined to continue the tradition.  So, I drove to Wal-Mart to pick up some long underwear.  Got some (and a blueraydvdplayerandacdrecorder) and drove straight to the car wash, where I got "The Works."  With my Corvette shining like a precious jewel, I drove home and got into my Santa suit.  
I put the top down and drove the block to the freeway.  I got about three miles down the road, answering to honks with cheery waves, when my hat blew off.  Unlike my 2001 Firebird, there was no back seat for it to land in, so I pulled off the freeway hatless.  I spotted three teenage girls walking along, one of them wearing a Santa hat, and was going to offer to buy it from her, but by the time I got my car turned around, they had disappeared.  Probably for the best.  It saved me some money and possible questioning by the police.
I had no idea where I was, so I punched the Home button on my navigator and let my car guide me back home.  Sigh.  By this time my ankle was throbbing, so I just decided to spend the rest of the day home.  
After Christmas, I'll buy another hat (at half price) and hope for better luck next year.
HOWEVER, if all the forecasts are wrong and it doesn't rain and sleet tomorrow, I might give it another shot. 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas, Lone Ranger! You, too, Tonto!