Friday, January 18, 2008

Me Again

Friday night and another work week begins and wow, am I tired! I feel like I'm looking at the screen through a piece of gauze. I spent the morning sitting in the nearest Chevy dealer. They took three hours to inform me that they could not repair my slowly-leaking tire. A new one would cost $520. Oh, and by the way, I should replace another one too. Oh, and by the way, they didn't keep them in stock, I'd have to pick them up Monday. So, as soon as I get off work Monday, I'll drive down there and hope I don't have to spend the day sleeping on their couch. If this keeps up, I hope I don't spend my life sleeping under a bridge. But, Corvettes are like kids. If you can't afford to take care of them, you shouldn't have one. I went Thursday to see my doctor again. She insisted that I go to diabetes education, even though I took it about eight years ago. What should have taken three hours took about five minutes, after the lady found out that I knew my stuff. The instructor informed my doctor that I was eating better than the average diabetic and that left my doctor with only two options: Either I wasn't taking my meds, or they weren't working. She chose the first. So, despite telling her that I take my pills faithfully, as soon as I get off work Tuesday, I have to go in again with all my pill bottles and prove that I can read the labels. At least I'll be driving on new tires. I believe I've told you that my new doctor has the longest fingers I've ever seen on a person. When you shake hands with someone, their fingertips usually come to rest over the bones of your pinky finger. But her fingertips come to rest between my two middle fingers. It's a bit disconcerting the first time it happens. It's like being grabbed by an octopus. I told you that to tell you this. While I was waiting in the examination room, I heard the doctor ask her nurse in the hallway, "Do we have any petroleum jelly?" My bottom-most orifice went "THWIIIPPP!" At that moment, I could have SCUBA dived on the Titanic and maintained a perfectly watertight seal. Turns out she needed it to do an EKG on another patient. WHEW!!!

6 comments:

Trader Rick said...

She's probably and Alien Hybrid.

Mark said...

I can't make a pithy comment to that. I'm laughing too hard.

Anonymous said...

I can't come up with anything clever to say, either. I'm working too hard to suppress the laughter so DH doesn't ask what I'm laughing about, and then I'd have to explain it. I'd probably die, gasping between guffaws, from oxygen deprivation. :)

Lone Ranger said...

I'm glad my tribulations can brighten some lives.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad to hear you avoided the love glove.

Mark said...

Obviously, like me, you've had a prostate exam in the past. I don't know how long my doctor's fingers were because I didn't notice, but they must have been either long or thick.

I couldn't walk normally for three days afterward.