Global Warming, It's the Jews' Fault

Hey, we can beat this global warming thing. All we have to do is burn fewer Hanukkah candles!

As reported this week by the Jerusalem Post, a group of Israeli environmental extremists calling themselves the "Green Hanukkia" campaign is sanctimoniously instructing Jews across the world to light one fewer candle in their Hanukkah menorahs this year in order to slow global warming.

According to the campaign's founders, each menorah candle can produce - hold your breath - a mind-boggling 15 grams of carbon dioxide. Multiplying this amount by the estimated 44 million candles that Israeli households will light during the eight-day Hanukkah holiday, they assert that "it adds up."

When did carbon dioxide become a pollutant? Plants breath it in and breath out oxygen. We breath in oxygen and breath out carbon dioxide. It's a perfect symbiosis, brought about by the totally random effects of the Big Bang. No intelligent design there.