Wendy's Hoaxer Arrested

The woman who claimed to find a finger in a container of Wendy's chili has been arrested and charged with grand larceny. But not before she sent business for Wendy's in a spiral that resulted in employee layoffs in the Bay area. I never believed for a minute that the story was true (how does a "well manicured" finger survive the grinding and cooking process?). But for those of you who still believe Julius and Ethel Rosenberg were innocent and that Hillary is presidential material, and who will never be able to eat a cup of Wendy's chili again, here's the recipe. 2 pounds ground beef One 29-ounce can tomato sauce One 29-ounce can kidney beans (with liquid) One 29-ounce can pinto beans (with liquid) 1 cup diced onion (1 medium onion) 1/2 cup diced green chili (2 chilies) 1/4 cup diced celery (1 stalk) 3 medium tomatoes, chopped 2 teaspoons cumin powder 3 tablespoons chili powder 1 1/2 teaspoons black pepper 2 teaspoons salt 2 cups water 1. Brown the ground beef in a skillet over medium heat; drain off the fat. 2. Using a fork, crumble the cooked beef into pea-size pieces. 3. In a large pot, combine the beef plus all the remaining ingredients, and bring to a simmer over low heat. Cook, stirring every 15 minutes, for 2 to 3 hours. Makes about 12 servings. I'd go out today and order some Wendy's chili, but since our local restaurant was taken over by a Pakistani family, they've never been able to get my order right. Who knows what I'd end up with.